Lindsay Clancys diary reveals her inner torment before she killed 3 kids: I want to die

Lindsay Clancy’s diary from the months before she strangled her three young kids revealed the dark thoughts and inner torment she struggled with — including once telling her husband, “I want to die” in response to hearing her baby’s cries during sleep training.The 35-year-old former labor and delivery nurse detailed in the journal her postpartum depression, anxiety, insomnia and being wracked with guilt over how she was raising 8-month-old Callan.She wrote in the diary that she had “horrible PTSD from sleep training Callan” and felt terrible that she had to stop breastfeeding him, according to excepts of the journal read to a jury Monday at her murder trial.“Hearing [Callan] cry for one plus hours and not intervening just about killed me,” she wrote.“I even said the words, ‘I want to die’ to Pat while [Callan] was crying,” Clancy wrote, referring to her then-husband, Patrick Clancy.“After that, I became obsessed with his sleep and nap schedule, to the minute,” Clancy wrote.She even worried the sleep training was “abusive” but later said it was the right decision.Clancy felt “incredibly sad and guilty about not breastfeeding anymore,” but she noted the choice to stop nursing was for “my mental health.”She also said she was “terrified of Callan getting sick” and added, “He’s a sick baby” who wasn’t “really hitting his milestones.”Clancy made entries from Oct.

13, 2022 through Jan.18, 2023 — five days before she strangled Cora, 5, Dawson, 3, and Callan with exercise bands in their Duxbury, Mass., home.

Clancy then slit her wrists and neck and threw herself from her upstairs bedroom window.She is now partially paralyzed and appears in court in a wheelchair.The excerpts were read out during the testimony of Massachusetts State Trooper Cory Melo, who collected and reviewed the diary, along with other journals, from Clancy’s home.“I’m completely overwhelmed taking care of the three kids.

I feel like I’m...