Rep.Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez recently announced that, at 36, she is freezing her eggs.
She has chosen to make the deeply personal process public, describing the decision as one that has given her a greater sense of control over her life and left her feeling empowered.I don’t begrudge her that decision.I hope she gets the family she wants, when she wants it.But her announcement made me think about the message my generation of women received about motherhood — and the one we are now passing down to future generations of girls.AOC DOCUMENTS EGG-FREEZING JOURNEY, TAKES AIM AT TRUMP ADMIN OVER WOMEN'S REPRODUCTIVE CHOICESWhen did postponing motherhood become a symbol of female empowerment?AOC and I are essentially the same age.
We came of age during the rise of the "girl boss," when female empowerment was increasingly defined by independence, achievement and personal fulfillment.Travel.
Build yourself.Establish yourself.
Prove yourself.When did postponing motherhood become a symbol of female empowerment?The message was relentlessly centered on the self: What do I want? What makes me happy? What life do I want to build? Put yourself first.Everything else can come later.Motherhood doesn’t fit neatly into a "me first" culture.
Children require sacrifice and rearrange our priorities around someone other than ourselves.No wonder a generation taught to prioritize the self learned to see children as something that might get in the way.ERIKA KIRK HITS BACK AT NY TIMES NEWSLETTER ABOUT MARRIAGE AND KIDS, ACCUSES WRITER OF MISSING THE POINTI believed it.I believed it so deeply that, for years, I wasn’t even sure I wanted children.I wasn’t a 25-year-old woman desperately longing for babies but forcing myself to wait.
I was a woman who had absorbed a culture that made motherhood look limiting.Children seemed like something that might interrupt the exciting life I was supposed to be building.We didn’t just teach women to delay motherhood.
We taught some women not t...