Will Marilyn Monroes iconic jeans turn us into bombshells? The Post put them to the test

On Thursday, a pair of jeans was thrown on my desk like a floppy fish at a sushi market.What appeared to be a basic, dark-wash pair was a recreation of Marilyn Monroe’s iconic denim from the 1961 movie “The Misfits,” rebuilt by designer Vivian Rivetti for Lee Jeans with a tiny bit more stretch but the same 65-year-old silhouette — high waisted, ankle cuff and all.The jeans are a part of a new Lee x Marilyn Monroe limited-edition collab, which also features the iconic Lee Storm Rider Jacket and chic white button-down shirt she was famously photographed wearing while sitting in a director’s chair on the set of “The Misfits.”To be frank, these $109 Marilyn jeans looked, to quote my adolescent tormenters, “super f—ing sad” — and I, along with some hesitant colleagues, were asked to wear them around The Post office to see if we felt like the legendary Norma Jean.As many women often feel when trying on a new pair of jeans, my first reaction once they were zipped and buttoned was “Ow.” Like all post-pandemic millennials, I am used to the kind of boyish, baggy jeans last seen on the wastoid skaters in Clueless, the looser and softer the better.These Marilyn jeans hit super high on me — like, past my belly button — and squeezed my waist like a toddler who doesn’t want to leave the park. Tightest at the butt and ankles, these pants had almost no stretch and, like the most boring guy you’ve ever bedded, they really only bend one way.

Sitting at my desk in them, I notice the dreaded “red line” forming where the zipper and top button hit my body, leaving an irritated rim of hot pink skin along the sides.It got worse when I ate my sad-desk salad at lunch, and the fiber from some green bell peppers hit my digestive tract. I felt sausaged.But then I looked in the mirror and the sentiment went from “owww” to “ohhhh.“My stomach was flatter.My butt was rounder.

My cowboy boots peeked out of the cuffed bottoms like a vintage Ralph Laur...