This luxury car turned my trip to the Hamptons Classic into a freezing ordeal

Some people out East — rich enough to not have to rough it in any four-in-a-one-bedroom share in some Hampton — patronized the Hampton Classic last week.It’s the Tiffany of horse shows, where attendees are so rich they can afford Crapdammy’s tax surcharge that will soon be slapped on a hot dog.

Mustard is extra.One friend decided to flash his brand-new Rolls, because what good’s a Rolls-Royce if you don’t show the thing off, right? So he took me for a ride.I was only marginally excited since years back my husband had one — only ours was famously always in the shop being repaired.My friend was driving.

Me in the back seat.Then, this friend parked because he needed to get something.

Me, I’m still in the back seat.He hugs me then shuts my door.

OK.Fine.Not so fine.

His errand took longer than expected.I’m locked in the back seat.

I want out.Can’t get out.

This super vehicle with elegant leather seats, frosted windows, TV cameras, flower vases and air conditioning, without any visible mechanism to switch off, turned the car into downtown Alaska.I am frostbitten.My friend has disappeared, obviously forever.

I decide to get the hell out of this car.Can’t! Can not! How?!No handle, no visible lock.No window opener visible.

No key.No mechanism.

No magic number to punch in to open the damn thing.Nothing.

I am locked in a strange, freezing, untested vehicle alone with no way to get out.Subscribe to our daily Post Opinion newsletter! Please provide a valid email.

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I look around for a lever, a latch, something besides my nail file to get the hell out.There is nothing that stands out.

The inside is as smooth as a baby’s behind.Windows didn’t even open.

And I couldn’t find my phone.Eventually, by the time I’d turned into a popsicle and was feeling scared, the owner returned.He then showed me a sm...