Dear Abby: My wifes weight transformation has given her a wandering eye

DEAR ABBY: I’ve been with my wife for 23 years.We have three kids and are in our early 40s.

My wife has always struggled with her weight, but two years ago she started a plan and has been successful.Her weight loss has prompted me to notice her more, and I’ve noticed, as I’ve paid more attention to her in the last few years, that she has a wandering eye.

I think it is disrespectful. To be clear, I’m fully aware that attractive people exist, and a quick look is fine with me.I’m not sure if this started after her weight loss, but it has caused issues at home.

I’ve brought it up with her, and we’ve had several arguments.I’ve presented multiple examples, and she claims it’s my insecurities.

While I do have insecurities, I would never jeopardize our relationship and only brought up this subject after multiple instances. We are at a standstill.I suggested a therapist for her, and things have only gotten worse.

The therapist has said I have “narcissistic traits,” and it’s creating a bigger wedge between us.I have thought about divorce multiple times.

I need some advice, please.— EYES ON HER IN CONNECTICUTDEAR ‘EYES’: Has your wife’s therapist ever met you? It seems strange that a professional would diagnose a client’s husband from a distance as having “narcissistic traits” when the problem might be simple insecurity after your wife has become more attractive as a result of her weight loss. Yes, attractive people get more attention.

And yes, people who were once less attractive may revel in their new status.However, this does not mean they are cheating.

Because you were so quick to suggest a therapist for your wife, please consider some counseling for yourself.DEAR ABBY: I host family birthday dinners for my two adult children, their spouses and my three grandchildren every year.This year, my son informed me that his son, the 8-year-old birthday boy, was having two friends (whom I had never met) sleep over and said they woul...