Dear Abby: Even though Im still with my unfaithful husband, my past flings are sending me DMs

DEAR ABBY: I am 39 and have been with my husband for 20 years.We got together when we were young, and our two kids are almost grown.

Early in our relationship, he cheated on me several times.I was able to move past that for the most part.

We have a solid relationship and life now.A few of my ex-boyfriends have reached out to me over the last 18 months.

I have removed myself from all social media and job websites, but they keep finding me.One of these men is occupying more time in my head than he should.I cannot stop thinking about him, and about a year ago we connected over the phone.

Nothing happened in person.I felt awful, and I told him I could no longer talk to him.

He found me again through a friend, and intruding thoughts are creeping back in all the time. I never got the opportunity to date around like my spouse did; he has slept with many women.I have only ever slept with him.

I feel like I missed out on something.I think I know the answer, but I can’t talk to anyone else about this.

— WONDERING IN THE NORTHWESTDEAR WONDERING: Don’t risk your solid relationship on a what-if.Your husband’s decades-old indiscretions are not an excuse to cheat on him now.

Instead of moving past them “for the most part,” let them go completely.They are ancient history.

Block the ex-boyfriend and ask your friends to stop giving out your number without your permission.If you need to rekindle the passion with your husband, consult a licensed couples counselor, either with him or on your own.DEAR ABBY: My wife and I have some longtime friends who said they would be passing through our area.

We invited them to have dinner with us and spend the night during their trip.They readily accepted and confirmed their afternoon arrival date and time a week in advance.Two hours before they were supposed to be here, we got a call from them saying, “Mix-up.

We’re busy tonight, so push dinner back to 10:30 p.m., and then we’ll spend the entire next day visiting with y...