Dear Abby: My daughter talks about her husband in a rude manner and I dont want to get involved

DEAR ABBY: My adult daughter wants to confide (complain) to me about her husband — his quirky behavior, things he does that she doesn’t like, etc.— nothing heavy or abusive.

I have told her that I think it’s inappropriate for her to talk to me about him, unfair to me and bad for the ongoing relationship I have with him. Instead, she’s confiding in my husband.I have told them both that maybe she should talk to her friends and therapist, since she has one.

She responded: “All of my friends talk to their parents about their husbands and get their advice.Usually, they talk to their moms, but since you won’t listen, I talk to Dad.”Am I wrong in thinking that a wife’s strongest relationship should be with her husband, and that it is disloyal to speak to her parents about nonthreatening aggravations? I never spoke to my parents about my marriage, though there was plenty I could have shared! Have the rules changed? — HEAR NO EVILDEAR HEAR NO EVIL: I’m not sure there ever were any universal rules about this.

Each family handles it in a way that works for them.If you dislike being your daughter’s marriage adviser but your husband doesn’t mind, I’d say they’ve hit upon the best solution for all involved.

However, because you don’t want to hear it, it would be best if they avoid holding their counseling sessions in your presence.DEAR ABBY: My sweet husband has a bad habit that I cannot correct.He goes into a room, pantry or closet and will not turn off the lights when he exits.

I then go into a room or closet and find the lights on, and he hasn’t been in there for 30 minutes.He says it’s no big deal.

I say it’s wasting electricity and money! What say you? — THRIFTY IN TEXASDEAR THRIFTY: I say you two could save yourselves money and have fewer arguments if you buy motion-sensing light switches that operate automatically.DEAR ABBY: My son, 47, informed me in January that he and his wife of 13 years are divorcing.(She initiated the d...